>.< Alright, so! Instead of my blog being filled with interesting informations.....it's been filled with jack shit because I've been up to my ass in "college" and "life".

*Sigh* College was not quite what I expected, and while the work itself isn't hard, keeping up with the mass ammounts of work is. Especially when you miss classes due to illness and or your family dicking you around. (Long story involving my Uncle & my two girl cousins).

So....I'm a chapter or so behind in Sociology, I have an essay that was due today that is going to be docked by 10 points because I'm turning it in Wednesday, I have some Algebra work today (no problem) and my Acting I teacher is a flake.

To explain my classes.....when I registered for classes, it was very very very last minute and I was working around Lexi's schedule since I was going in with her. Unfortunately, I got saddled with a class I'd rather not have taken: Acting I. I was going to take introduction to Animal Biology (with a kick ass professor who I was really looking forward to learning under! I <3 Dr. Dry!) but...

*sigh* Here, let me go back to the beginning....

A week before school was to start, we went and registered for classes. Lexi did hers with her little advisor, showed me her little schedule, and I ran off to meet with my advisor, Doctor Kenrick Thompson.

Now, I didn't know at the time who the hell "Ken Thompson" was. He was just listed as an advisor. I didn't know he was a professor. When we arrived at his office, I found out that not only is he a Doctor, he's a Doctor of Sociology (one of the courses I was most looking forward to taking.) He pretty much owns the Sociology department. Rawr.

So, I get into his office, he asks me if I have any idea of what i want to take, I explain that I have a list typed up of courses I need to talk for my associates, as well as the electives I'd like to take, and he promptly informs me that I am his favorite Advisee and then tells me that while he has no problem helping me set my classes up, I might enjoy setting them up myself online more. He explained that through the school website, I could arrange my own schedule and check thing sout myself so that I could take a more direct approach and use him solely for academic advisory. He made sure to note that he was not trying to brush me off, and of course I understood and told him it was fine, I knew he was just trying to help make me self sufficient. He gave me a piece of paper that outlines the requirements for the Associate of Arts degree, told me my log in information to go down to the library and change my courses, and that was that. I was determined and hellbent to have at least one of his classes this semester. This guy made me feel at ease.

SO! I did all that, blah blah blah...

My class line up was as follows:

College Algebra - MWF 10:00 am - Ms. Shipman
Principles of Sociology - MWF 11:00 am - Dr. Thompson
Composition I - MW 1:00 pm - Ms. Young
Introduction to Animal Biology - TR - 1:00 pm - Dr. Dry

Things were going fine, I found out we would have to dissect in Bio and was going to stick it out...hated Ms. Young 'cause she's a good ol' Southern gal with good ol' Southern Attitudes. (C'mon ya'll, you know me, am I going to like a teacher who pops off with "that's so gay" on the first day of class? And NO I didn't make my sole opinion of her based on that. I really really tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, I swear. But over the past 4 weeks, I've really come to dislike this woman.)

Anyways.....on the 3rd day of school *sigh* Mom calls to tell me that she went ot fill one of my prescriptions and the pharmacist wigged out and explained that two of my medicines were known to tear up stomaches and that if I had any kind of stomache problem, I shouldn't be taking either of them, let alone together.

So she makes me an appointment to see the Doc that afternoon and tells Lexi to take me to it. So we go *sigh*

Now at this point (the 3rd day of class, August 25th), I've been having horrible back pain since school started and it's so bad that I'm almost puking in class. Now, mind you, I've had a bad back for years and years, I always have back pain, I just never told my doctor because I didn't want to sound like a whiner. (I hate sounding like a hypocondriac, so I sucked it up and dealt with it all these years. And I'm talking from the time I was 10 or so....my mom use to have me lay on the floor and she'd pop my back to help me feel better and stuff.)

So....I finally tell him and he tells me he thinks that because of the pull of gravity on my spine because of my wieght, my vertibrae are mashing together and creating bone spurs which are very painful. (Sounds like my symptoms to me!)

So he send sme to get get Xrays, but the clinics xray machine was broken that day, and I had an appointment in two weeks anyways from a prior visit, so we'd do it then. Apparently that appointment got erased 'casue the office had no knowledge of it, so we just remade it.

Anyways.....I was told I needed to talk to him before leaving the office, with or without the xrays, so I go back and wait until he's done with his other patients, and then he and I talk alone 'cause Lex went outside to have a cig.

*sigh* He told me he thinks I should have gastric stappling done because we've tried everything else for my wieght, nothing is working, and my fat ass is killing me. I'm a sitting duck for diabetes, I already have PCOS, Hypothyroidism, and arthritic conditions, amongst everything else, and he said that right now, I'm a very healthy kid except for all the problems caused by my wieght and he thinks that if we did the surgery now, there'd be very few complications since I don't have many risk factors. He also pointed out that if we wait until, say, I'm crippled with diabetes, we're going to regret it. SO.....

I leave the office, go home, try not to cry the whole time in Lexi's truck and then Dan's car....and when I get home I tell Adam, and then mom. We decide to go for it.

This means dropping Animal bio because while I could handle puking during dissecting and was going to tough it out for the good of my education, if I puke after surgery....I can throw staples and die. SO....

That's how I ended up in Acting. I didn't want to be there, but it was a convenience thing because I have to have 12 credit hours at least to keep my scholarship.

Anyways, I'm up to my ass and work and I'm sick.

Adam and I's anniversary passed and was wonderful, he asked me to marry him, officially. No ring yet, 'cause I need a special size for my fat lil fingers, but, ya' know (^-^)

My birthday came and went, I can buy ciggerettes now. Yaye.

I'm working on getting my license, and mom told me that the Aztec is mine to take back and forth to school once I get my license (YEEEEEAH BABY!)

And....last Thursday I got my left over funds from my pell grant (still gotta finish up the stuff for my Stafford loan)......and Mom owes me 105, Lexi owes me 420......and I've got 300 left. *sigh* Out of 1200. Can we say ouch? But I got some nice things for myself, including a little bit of clothes. *Sigh*

Friday was X-Ray day. *sigh* We go in, they immediately ship me to X-Ray before I ever see the Dr. *sigh* We get them done, they stuff us in the room to wait, and I guess they process them and show them to him and a while later...he comes in.

*Sigh* I have the spine of a 65 year old woman at 18 years old. I have bone spurs out the ass, two of my vertibre are forming a V together and are fractured and shit and it's just bad.

So yeah, you can imagine my glee.

I really don't like college and most days....I don't even want to go. Don't get me wrong, College Algebra and Sociology, I usually really enjoy and am good to go with.

But on Mondays & Wednesdays, there's English afterwords. Except today 'cause I'm sick and I did *not* want to stick around to deal with Ms. Yuppie. And it was convenient 'cause Lex had to leave school early, so yeah, whatever.

So yeah....I dunno....Acting isn't so bad it's just not my thing...Comp I, I had expected to enjoy and instead hate because my teacher is a fucking reject....and....yeah..

My faith is off the wall, as always. That fuck upstairs is messing with my head again and keeps trying to get me to go back. *Sigh* Maybe if *points up* hadn't pushed me away to begin with, we wouldn't be HAVING this problem.

Kaitlin kissed me last weekend. (Not this weekend, but the one right after my birthday....the 9th and stuff). It kinda sent mixxed signals, but she keeps squacking about being straight when we talk about enjoying breasts and stuff...so hey. Love her or not, I'm not about to fuck with our friendship like that.

Not much else is up, just trying to cope as best as I can. *sigh* The electric in the trailer still isn't on, though UB is going to get the conduit for it tommorow (again), and I guess he's taking me to class while we're up there, so at least I don't have to hang around for hours afterwords or before class. Yaye. *sigh*

I've been sick for the better part of the last month, and it's getting old. I can't keep missing class, but going to school sick isn't helping either. I bombed my first Algebra test. I'm really tired of this and really stressed out. I wish things could just be you know....sane for awhile. *sigh* I can't wait until Thanksgiving.

*curls up in bed and goes to sleep and tries not to whimper too much* I'm really tired of hurting...*sigh*. Anyways....everything hurts, I want to cry. So I'm going to go.

Love ya'll lots.
~Manda

posted by Manda @ 11:36 PM+

Post a Comment

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *